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How to Talk to A Stubborn Egoistical Husband / Wife

How to Talk To A Stubborn, Egotistical Husband / Wife – By Nicola Beer

When you are in a relationship, arguing with your partner can exhaust you and leave you feeling frustrated all the time. If you are prepared to get into an argument with your partner to confront them or try to change their behaviour, think about what you want. It’s also a good idea to find ways to redirect the conversation by steering them where you want to go rather than letting them control the argument. Remember to stay calm at all times in order to keep the situation as calm as possible. As well as to start calmly when I do my marriage counselling Abu Dhabi and Dubai or online in the couple sessions we always start off discussing what they value and appreciate about each other most to set a loving tone before we get into the complaints.

Here are 6 things to keep in mind when engaging with your husband or wife who is stubborn or egotistical and always has to be right.

How to deal with a stubborn egotistical wife / husband 1. Prepare yourself

Try to figure out what the underlying cause is for this person to act this way. Usually these kinds of people will fall into one of the two categories. Some can have some deep-rooted feelings of insecurity which makes them lash out like this as a way to cover it up. While others actually genuinely believe they know it all and feel like they are doing everyone a favour by offering (or forcing) their knowledge onto others. If you can identify which category your partner falls into, you may be able to act accordingly. Generally when an insecure know-it-all is told they are wrong they will become defensive. Try to ask leading questions instead with this kind of person which can work better. However, with the second type of person, it’s usually better to let them talk and offer up your opinion afterwards.

How to deal with a stubborn egotistical wife / husband 2.Think twice

You need to weigh up how much you are willing to risk in this relationship by choosing to engage with them. Think about how important this relationship is and how much you are willing to lose. Also, keep in mind how important this argument is in the greater scheme of things. Remember though, that no matter how careful you can think you are being, engaging in any argument can damage the relationship completely. Think of it this way, if you are working for a know it all, you could risk your job by engaging in an argument. If the person who you are engaging in an argument with is your partner, think about how important the relationship is and if it will survive the confrontation.

How to deal with a stubborn egotistical wife / husband 3. Decide what you want out of it

Choose what it is you are trying to get from this argument because you should have an objective, ultimately. Perhaps you are looking for them to see your side of things or you are looking for them to acknowledge how you have been feeling but whatever you are looking for you need to know what it is you want before you get into the argument.

How to deal with a stubborn egotistical wife / husband 4.Make sure your facts are right

Make sure you have your facts straight especially if you are arguing about something that is facts-based. Bring as much evidence into the discussion as you can to back yourself up and make sure when looking for evidence to help you that you use unbiase sources opposed to using ones that are telling you what you want to hear.

How to deal with a stubborn egotistical wife / husband 5.Listen

You need to make sure you also listen to your partner. Even if they think they are right, they still deserve to be heard just like you would want to be heard. And don’t just listen to them to reply, actually hear what they are saying. In the marriage makeover program I cover extensively how to take your marriage communication techniques to the next level you can read more about it here

https://training.nicolabeer.com/audio-program-1

How to deal with a stubborn egotistical wife / husband 6. Ask plenty of questions

Be sure to ask lots of questions because your partner may not be as forthcoming with the information as you would like them to be. By asking questions, you can figure out what is going on beneath the surface. So make sure you listen well and ask questions that will give you a better understanding of the argument.

How to deal with a stubborn egotistical wife / husband 7. Agree then offer your counter

This is one of the ways to argue with a person who thinks they know it all. By agreeing with them or taking their side, you are showing them that you understand what they are saying. And right after you agree, that is when you present your counter-argument. Say something like I hear what you’re saying, but here’s what I think.

How to deal with a stubborn egotistical wife / husband tip 8. Don’t be threatening

The way you say things in the argument can determine the outcome. If you put your opinion in a threatening way the other person is likely to shut down completely. The way you say it can help to get the other person to listen better. Be diplomatic about the way you put your comments across.

How to deal with a stubborn egotistical wife / husband 9. Move away from direct confrontation

Instead of confronting the person directly with advice, they can shut down and it defeats the purpose. Try asking questions instead of directly stating what you want to say. Ask as many questions to lead the person on the path you are trying to get them to follow. Directly telling them something won’t work in this kind of argument. In the couples counselling in Dubai and online I offer I cover how to avoid direct confrontation.

I also cover how to ask the right questions in the communication for marriages in the marriage makeover audio program which you can check out here https://training.nicolabeer.com/audio-program-1

How to deal with a stubborn egotistical wife / husband 10. Don’t take things personally

This one may seem hard and it is but it would do you well to keep this top of mind throughout the argument. When you take things personally, you can get emotional and that is usually how the argument can unravel pretty quick. Loving yourself through this is key, if you struggle with low self-esteem and self-love for yourself and want to change it – check out this inspiring page for help with that https://nicolabeer.com/toolkit

Thanks for reading if you are interested in my couples counselling in Dubai, Abu Dhabi or online or want to know more about the audio program I invite you to book a free 20 minute call with me to find out more… you can email me at nicola@purepeacecoaching.com

or book a complimentary 20 minute consultation to discuss with Nicola Beer by copying this URL https://nicolabeer.as.me/breakthrough

Nicola Beer offers:

Stress management and anxiety treatment Dubai and online

Couples counselling in Dubai, Abu Dhabi, London and online

Hypnotherapy in Dubai and online

Natural ways to treat depression, trauma, PTSD,

Somatic therapy and dance / movement therapy

To discuss book a free personal breakthrough session with Nicola Beer you can copy it here URL https://nicolabeer.as.me/breakthrough

Mila TutorMila Tutor
07:10 25 Mar 23
I have worked with Nicola for some time now and have found her to be compassionate, kind, and extremely helpful. She has helped me a lot.
Riti SajitRiti Sajit
06:58 25 Mar 23
Nicola is a wonderful human 🤍 Thank you for helping me through my difficult time.Still living by your words and advice. I would definitely recommend anyone needing relationship counseling to try Nicola :)
Mihaela BotnariMihaela Botnari
12:54 17 Mar 23
Thank you for destroying my relationship. My partner reached out for support and you advised him that there is nothing for him to heal and that he should send his girlfriend for therapy, like this is your place to tell him. I’ve been through therapy myself and I know how to make the difference between a good therapist and someone who just wants to get more money, and the second seems to definitely be your purpose!
Helen HHelen H
19:13 10 Nov 22
Nicola’s support and advice proved invaluable when my marriage was struggling. Over a series of meetings (online and fact to face, to suit our needs), Nicola helped steer us through a very difficult time. She was always calm, neutral and never made us feel like we had failed or had ‘messed up’. Nicola has a wealth of experience and keeps up with current research, but has a very unique approach to getting you back on track. With regular support materials and just being there, she helped us realise that our relationship could go on; by making us look at ourselves and helping us consider the tools we needed to move forwards. I can honestly say that I don’t think our marriage would have survived such a difficult time without Nicola’s expertise. I often listen to Nicola’s podcasts on Spotify when I’m needing a bit of extra support. Thank you, Nicola
Justin LossJustin Loss
13:23 30 Jun 22
Nicola has been a massive help. I had tried traditional counseling and it had seemed to be moving me further away from what I wanted. After listening to several of Nicola's podcasts I decided to reach out to her. The discovery call was enlightening and she described a process that was more focused on creating a better future vs reliving the pass. From there I went through her Breakthrough Program...All I can say is Wow! Her program and guidance has quickly changed my mindset which has in turn improved all my relationships and overall stress level. I highly recommend working with Nicola and can't thank her enough for her help and care.
Ciaran CarlisleCiaran Carlisle
22:16 23 Jan 22
My partner and I spent a number of sessions with Nicola discussing our relationship difficulties, both together and one on one sessions. She has been so good to talk to - incredibly helpful and understanding with our problems.My partner and I have come out of this with a better understanding and move love for each other. Nicola has taught us many techniques to use in situations were we feel at odds which has been fantastic. We would recommend Nicola 100% for relationship advice.Thank you so much again.
Loida Delgado-PerezLoida Delgado-Perez
03:09 22 Jan 22
Nicola's marriage counselling have been life changing for both my partner and I. The learnings have been exponential and have transform us individually and as a couple. We reached out to Nicola at the lowest point of our relationship and about to break apart. Her compassionate and smart yet practical advice and exercises transform us in such a way that we are now at the best we've ever been personally and as a couple.As a result we've decided to get married and book Nicola every year for a couple's check in! I couldn't recommend her sessions more to anyone feeling stuck and wanting to be in a better place. Best investment of time, money and effort EVER. Thank you Nicola, you are an inspiration to me and many others :)
Christianne KaddoumChristianne Kaddoum
17:19 20 Oct 21
The hours I’ve spent working with Nicola have been the most valuable of my life.I now feel equipped to do things differently. It’s been the most liberating and empowering experience and I’ve learnt things that will stay with me forever.Through the excellent help from Nicola, it is now possible for me to have a different and healthier approach to various situations.She has professionally helped me to consider my perspectives in a way I hadn’t before.I can finally begin to reframe my life experience and see them in a whole new light.Thanks Nicola!
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