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Couples Working Together In Own Business – Tips for Harmony



Working and sharing a business with your partner can be amazing and it can also be very stressful especially if the roles are not clearly defined or the business is struggling to survive.


The National Federation of Independent Businesses stated that around 43% of small businesses are in fact family run and 53% of small business management is shared between couples. Many couples find that establishing a business together and working to make their venture successful gives them a unique opportunity to learn more about each other but can add strain as also lets them support one another in a way they wouldn’t do if they worked with other people.



I’ve worked with many couples where a person speaks down to the other person in work, in a way they wouldn’t dare to speak to others. This was certainly the case for Fiona and Pete who ran a clothing company. Pete was constantly asking Fiona for updates on what she had done in the day for the business and made comments about how she could do things better. If Fiona suggested ways to improve their business, Pete would be defensive and respond aggressively. It was clear there was an imbalance in who got to control how the business was run. She also felt humiliated in meetings because he would tell her off in front of the staff. He felt it was good to show the team that she had no special treatment and to enforce higher standards in the business.

After a while their connection was broken, sex life went down to zero as Fiona began dreading to see him. She was holding in so much resentment that she didn’t want to be touched by him anymore.


You cannot be a micro manger or aggressive employer and then expect to have close, loving and intimate relationship with one another as emotions can spill over from work to home life. In fact I help many couples navigate how best to work together as a team in business.  When they do my couples program not only do they feel happier in the relationship, their profits and revenue increases too in a positive collaborative environment. How you treat your partner in business will impact your relationship, so it’s so important to treat one another with respect, kindness and encouragement.



For couples working together –

  • Be clear on your roles

When couples work together, they often neglect to allocate specific roles or job descriptions to one another as it is easier to become all-rounders when the business is your own. However, this leaves a lot of room for misunderstanding and conflict. Agreeing on specific roles or job description, each person is fully aware of what is expected of them in the business and there is no hierarchy of who is the boss of who.


Remember, it can be easy to snap at your partner because they are the closest one to you and you’re working together so you may see a lot more of one another than other couples who don’t work together, however, this can be worked to your advantage. Talk through your strengths and weaknesses with one another, maybe you can support one another with professional development which will in turn help your business thrive even more. Value one another’s efforts and opinions, regardless of financial success.


  • Have set working times and personal times

Any issues that arise at work should be kept at work. Limit the crossover of professional discussions into personal time. For example, have work meetings during work hours outside of the home, this will help you both distinguish between your love life and your work life. This will also encourage you both to have better quality time at home doing things you both love, rather than doing things you need to do because you’re focusing on the financial gain through your business.


Make a conscious effort to make the most of your personal time together. Working together can make you feel like you are spending enough time with one another, but the reality is working together is not the same as having fun together. Plan movie nights, nights out where you both get dressed up and go out to your favourite restaurant etc. Keep the love alive.


  • You’re on the same team

This point applies to all couples. Remember you are on the same team! So, your goals, efforts and beliefs should all be contributing towards a healthy future together – one that benefits you both and brings you closer together.


Plan together, make decisions together, cheer each other on and talk to one another. This makes each person in the relationship feel valued irrespective of their financial success. It also helps to refocus on the connection between you and your partner, rather than solely focusing on financial gain.


Ideally we want everything right loving close relationships, fun times, financial success and career fulfillment – we can have them all it takes commitment to be balanced and it is so worth it.


Stay focused on your goals and aim to be on the journey together, as the journey to your dreams is just as important as the end goal.



Mihaela BotnariMihaela Botnari
12:54 17 Mar 23
Thank you for destroying my relationship. My partner reached out for support and you advised him that there is nothing for him to heal and that he should send his girlfriend for therapy, like this is your place to tell him. I’ve been through therapy myself and I know how to make the difference between a good therapist and someone who just wants to get more money, and the second seems to definitely be your purpose!
Helen HHelen H
19:13 10 Nov 22
Nicola’s support and advice proved invaluable when my marriage was struggling. Over a series of meetings (online and fact to face, to suit our needs), Nicola helped steer us through a very difficult time. She was always calm, neutral and never made us feel like we had failed or had ‘messed up’. Nicola has a wealth of experience and keeps up with current research, but has a very unique approach to getting you back on track. With regular support materials and just being there, she helped us realise that our relationship could go on; by making us look at ourselves and helping us consider the tools we needed to move forwards. I can honestly say that I don’t think our marriage would have survived such a difficult time without Nicola’s expertise. I often listen to Nicola’s podcasts on Spotify when I’m needing a bit of extra support. Thank you, Nicola
Justin LossJustin Loss
13:23 30 Jun 22
Nicola has been a massive help. I had tried traditional counseling and it had seemed to be moving me further away from what I wanted. After listening to several of Nicola's podcasts I decided to reach out to her. The discovery call was enlightening and she described a process that was more focused on creating a better future vs reliving the pass. From there I went through her Breakthrough Program...All I can say is Wow! Her program and guidance has quickly changed my mindset which has in turn improved all my relationships and overall stress level. I highly recommend working with Nicola and can't thank her enough for her help and care.
Ciaran CarlisleCiaran Carlisle
22:16 23 Jan 22
My partner and I spent a number of sessions with Nicola discussing our relationship difficulties, both together and one on one sessions. She has been so good to talk to - incredibly helpful and understanding with our problems.My partner and I have come out of this with a better understanding and move love for each other. Nicola has taught us many techniques to use in situations were we feel at odds which has been fantastic. We would recommend Nicola 100% for relationship advice.Thank you so much again.
Loida Delgado-PerezLoida Delgado-Perez
03:09 22 Jan 22
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Christianne KaddoumChristianne Kaddoum
17:19 20 Oct 21
The hours I’ve spent working with Nicola have been the most valuable of my life.I now feel equipped to do things differently. It’s been the most liberating and empowering experience and I’ve learnt things that will stay with me forever.Through the excellent help from Nicola, it is now possible for me to have a different and healthier approach to various situations.She has professionally helped me to consider my perspectives in a way I hadn’t before.I can finally begin to reframe my life experience and see them in a whole new light.Thanks Nicola!